DatingDoc Podcast | The Monopoly of Dating: Who Owns Your Matches

good afternoon good morning good week whenever you're watching this this is Chris the dating doc and I'm here with the dating doc podcast it is July 20 of 2018 and we got a good subject here at hand we're gonna talk about tinder versus Bumble okay and it's more specifically match group and what's going on in the world of dating and why I feel that they are they bastardize the dating process so it's gonna be a good topic now understand first off that I am the dating doc what we do is we provide dating advice we see clients throughout the week and it is a play on words with a company it's not just called the dating doc because we're the cure for the common date but it's the dating doc because we document it's a documentary on the lifestyle of dating and we do that because we want to round out your understanding of dating nowadays it's not just providing and pumping you of advice it's also finding out what is going on around society that affects companionship dating meeting that right person and enjoying the process so what we got going on today is you know here's the thing now if unless you've been living in a cave you understand that there's websites that you meet singles on websites and apps and about three-quarters if not four-fifths depending on how you want to play your fractions are owned by match group limited now match group Limited is a company that as you know owns Matt's com owns plenty of fish OkCupid tinder they have a huge stake in tinder and in what they've been looking at doing is acquiring Bumble for those that are not familiar tinder and Bumble are the top two dating swiping apps so I'm sure you've heard the swipe left swipe right and why is there a drama you're probably wondering okay what what does this matter to me it's not a juicy topic who controls your matches okay this is important because dating nowadays it almost feels like it's been bastardized in a way and in the past you know 15-20 years ago there was a little bit more that magic and that first impression and nowadays singles are too busy at happy hour staring down at their phones swiping left and right instead of trying to catch that eye contact and that good first impression so it's important for you to know who owns your dating world and in this case it's more likely going to be match group limited and also Bumble so so what's going on here okay so you're probably wondering let's get into this so Whitney Hurd who's the chief executive officer bumble which by the way bumble is out of Austin an hour north of San Antonio is accusing match group of bullying tactics reason being is that match group offered bumble four hundred fifty million dollars to acquire it bumble obviously turned that down now what's interesting is that Whitney heard she actually left tinder she was one of the co-founders after allegations of her receiving sexual assault or you know there's sexual assault accusations from other executives that that tinder so she broke off and created bumble which as we know is a is a rival is a competitor to tinder now Mandy Ginsburg who is the match group chief executive officer CEO she told staffers an internal memo obtained by market watch that the lawsuit that bumble was hitting tinder with was about protecting the integrity of their work and not singling any out any individual company now what bumble accused match of is not only the bullying tactics but the fact that the the lawsuit was trying to defame bumble and this was more honestly a little bit petty because what ended up happening was match is almost like that over protective big brother and what gets me about it is that you know match being this honestly a little bit petty and trying to acquire bumble so instead well they just talk crap about bumble and bumble again retorts and responds with a one-page full ad on the New York Times and it says we swipe left on you we swipe left on your multiple attempts to buy us copy us and now intimidate us and you know it's interesting because again match groupies should be part of an interactive core and they had a whole host of other websites and then match group broke off and is now in a way a cartel of online dating websites everything from again OkCupid plenty of fish matchom also our time black people meet the list goes on and on and they've even you know have even continued to acquire this is a company that did go public back in October 2015 so not only are they in the business of getting more subscribers and getting more people to pay for services and ads things of that sort but now they got to make the stockholders happy and what I have found is that when a company starts off with great intentions and then now has to answer to stockholders things can go a little bit awry and I think that's a little bit of what's happening with match you know it it's one thing where if you want to control and you wanna you want to evolve the way people watch movies like Netflix it's another thing if you want to change the way that people buy things which Amazon and Walmart online have changed the game but when you're when you're changing dating and courtship you know something that to me is a lot more of a human process it does take time it's not as easy and is it's not a tangible i buy and receive type of product like Amazon or Netflix you're really messing with something here and what ended up happening in my opinion is that match group has turned from hey let's really focus on get some good relationships going to let's just get a quantity of people that are gonna swipe left swipe right and become customers become members and I feel that bumble is a little bit of that underdog I'm not gonna say that that it's it's you know I'm just gonna root on bumble because they happen to be the underdog because they're not the bigger company but at the same time they're not public yet and right now they're showing that they're not trying to acquire other companies they're trying to stand on their own and you know again especially when you have a founder from tinder again I Whitney heard the CEO of bumble breaking off from tinder and saying you know what we're gonna make this a better experience for woman if you know that bumble is the way that works the way bumble is different from tinder is that bumble does want women to initiate conversation that's just a way that user interface works tinder has been accused of being more of a hook-up app you know that's it's kind of the the label that it's been to been placed on tinder and but again it's part of a family of other web sites like a Matchcom like a plenty of fish like a OkCupid that in some ways have been looked at as hookup apps maybe not as much Match

com but certainly plenty of fish I you know III think plenty of fish was one of those free websites back in the days that people would go to when they didn't want to pay for Matchcom and you get what you pay for we're not paid for so plenty of fish was a in a way it was it was a it was a wasteland of hookups or if you want to look at it it could be the junkyard of hookups or the buffet of hookups but it definitely was the first hookup website and I would hear that from a lot of clients through my first company in scenergy dating this is years before tinder came out so what we got right now is we have this landscape of dating that has become more of a candy crush of dating okay they're gonna make more money off of guess what memberships and activity they honestly do not care if if you're making you know any kind of connection or relationships they don't make money off of that and I don't blame them you know I don't blame them it's it's like saying it's like comparing Netflix and saying well Netflix cares about how many movies you like in a way yes but they're not gonna listen to those individual stories what they're gonna want is they want statistics in this case they're gonna want hey how many people have seen our our new movie bright you know the Will Smith movie where he's a he has an ogre as a partner and this movie was actually created based on algorithms you know Netflix was looking at what are our fans looking at our members looking at and let's create a movie based on those algorithms and you know statistics now what you've got is you got a culture of swiping this is not a culture of connecting people this is not you know this is not the the 20 years ago when a eharmony was the biggest competitor and again eharmony was more of a paste process the CEO Ed Warren was all about how can we get people to take a pause and really get to know each other online and you know I'm not gonna be biased and say that eharmony or Bumble or tenders better or matchcom but the landscape has changed folks we are in a society that is addicted to novelty swiping hitting your phone going back and seeing notifications seeing what's new seeing what's customized and it's just very dangerous when that has affected dating because again after a while what you're gonna end up running into is you're gonna run into a world where the young folks the ones that are used to snapchat Instagram tinder bumble whatever else comes out you know I'm sure there's gonna be another app that's gonna come out it's just really a one one word app that's kind of the new things nowadays right tinder bumble I don't know wazoo you know names in the names escape me but you know zoosk there you go there's another one so these young folks are gonna get used to simply communicating with each other digitally so when they go to a coffee shop when they go to happy hour when they go to a baby shower when they go to a cruise when they're out on vacation somewhere that has Wi-Fi they're gonna be more attuned to their phone and their matches then making that magical moment happen and what's gonna be a little bit sad is that whenever they don't have the Wi-Fi whenever they can't get access to their phones it's gonna be a little more amplified when they run into someone naturally and they may confuse it for first love or you know just some fling when they're in Belize they have no Wi-Fi and they connect with a local hotel employee for example and all of a sudden they find out oh crap the only reason that I have this quick infatuation it's because I'm away from my phone everything feels natural and that's why this matters that's why this conversation of what's happening between tinder and Bumble they're basically fighting for the existence of our swipes of our activity online rather than focusing on the Society of dating and I'm telling you right now folks I feel like we're in a dating recession I really feel like we're in a dating recession we have people that are had become really cynical about the process they're they're exhausting the their attention span has shortened and this is all thanks to who owns your matches which is in this case thank you match group thank you for proving to us that it's not about connections anymore it's about two statistics it's about how much swiping there is how much activity is happening on your app and in a way this is a this is a fault of supply and demand it is a fault of our emphasis on addicting apps you know I remember years ago when Angry Birds was was all I had to worry about when it came to addictive games and farmville anyone remember that right farmville and angry bird that seems like eons ago but now I've seen I've seen dinner tables full of families that just staring at their phones I've seen couples that are silently having dinner staring at their phones and these are couples they're already together yet they're not together so imagine the dating process which is a it's it's a necessary evil if you want to call it that before you get to the relationship and again if right now we're falling victim to this swiping culture this let me just look through pictures and look for what's better on the other side what's better on the other side what's better on the other side where is that gonna lead us to we can't get back time we cannot get back time at all and we're looking at you know getting back to the topic of the business side of it it might be a good thing that a Matz doesn't buy bumble they can focus on looking at their websites themselves you know how can they how can they differ the matchcom from the plenty of fish from the OkCupid they need to spend some money on some of the internal websites roll out some new features and if they really care it would focus on Matt's comm their flagship I mean match Group Limited is named after their flagship website Matt's comm matches the older brother of all those websites and what they really need to do is say look let's focus on how to make people connect to me that's the goodwill most companies have some sort of goodwill mission they donate back to the community they they have some sort of charity or service that they provide well guess what match your goodwill match group your goodwill should be give back to the community by having a little bit more of an emphasis on quality connections they try to do this years ago they try to do this years ago with their events and it fail it fail because they knew that it was a logistical nightmare and I am dies with that for those that had followed me from these scenergy dating days scenergy dating was an events company and it was a logistical nightmare when I sold an equal number of 20 to 30 tickets on each side male and female and we have an event and five males on show up and all of a sudden the females are upset or vice versa but I did it at a good intent I knew that was the best way to get people away from their phones and to talk to each other so I I believe that's the best way match needs ago is don't try to buy Bumble competition is a great thing competition breeds success between a company and for Bumble just keep doing you keep going the path of curating this as a woman led experience traditionally we know the men are the initiators and sometimes we can bet we can get overly aggressive or release sexual so when a woman leads that initial message it's gonna it's going to be kind of like a down boy calm down boy and I think that'll lead to more quality companionship and quality swipes quality picking if that makes sense so question for you guys if you've made it this far I'm really testing out the duration of these podcasts to make sure I'm not losing the audience here so on tinder you know has your has your user experience improved or degraded on tinder you know you still see it as a hook-up app compared to bumble you know do you are you on both do you enjoy bumble more so I want to hear your comments on that if you feel that tinder has improved or if you can feel if you can feel that they're just trying to get you hooked on those swipes and also the other part of that question is if you're on both apps if you're both on tinder and Bumble so we got some we got a good next topic here it's best date ideas everyone's always wants to do the old hey let's meet up for coffee or let's meet up for lunch or dinner you know what let's let's hear from you guys I want to know what are some good dating ideas you know it doesn't matter if it's horseback riding doesn't matter if it's a scavenger hunt whatever I want to hear from you the best date idea okay all you have to do is comment below the best data idea will be entered in a $2500 Amazon gift card this is a challenge that I will respond to the winner I will respond to on my youtube channel and you will get a $25

00 Amazon gift card I'm not the community you are the community okay we're all part of this but I can't do this alone I need your input what I'm really starting to do is what I want to do is start a revolution of awareness of dating and if I can make dating a more enjoyable process it doesn't mean it has to lead to marriage but if you if you want to enjoy dating and you believe that this can be improved then be part of our community not just by hitting like but be part of it again $25 Amazon gift card challenge respond below with your best date idea I'm Chris Feliciano the dating doc signing off and thank you for listening take care

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